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A Three No Trumps to the Three Idiots

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Idiots dont wear horns

By:     Sohail Parwaz

Three No Trumps

It has become a fashion to talk about the fate and fortune of Pakistan every now and then and every here and there. Ever since the genesis of this land of crisis the ‘well wishers’ have a lost sleep for it. The ‘earnest’ aficionado is Pakistan’s neighbour India who started dreaming about its dismemberment from the day one, followed by a flock of Odysseuses from the West, the pseudo think tanks and the intellectuals. Balkanizing Pakistan isn’t a new idea at all. Those who really know that how dominating, dictating and tenable the existence of Pakistan is, have a reason to have a lost sleep. Many of them are still in their trainee diapers yet they claim to be the brains and brilliants of the time. The blessing in disguise for them is the prejudice and biased western media who is supporting the indecent theme all along for the

David Cameron

vested interests. If we look at it critically, we will find that Pakistan is being treated as an underdog with a stick and carrot strategy. Pakistan’s too much of nicety and selfless cooperation in the GWOT has put across the wrong signal and those who have got nothing to do with the Paki-affairs have picked up the guts to point an accusing finger at Pakistan for the crimes not even known to the plaintiffs. During the last few days anti-Pakistan statements, comments and views came in the shape of a volley with the excellent timings, by the criminals, critics and of all the controllers of a stature no less than the British Prime Minster David Cameron.

After all what else one would call a hacker if not criminal. A certified criminal and Australia’s notorious ‘ethical computer hacker’ named Julian Assange, a member of a hackers’ troupe named “International Subversives”, whose Melbourne home was raided by the Australian Federal Police in 1991 and who, throughout, had a disgusting cyber record. Assange was reported to have accessed unethically various computers, of an Australian university, a telecommunications company, and a couple of other organizations, via modem to test their security flaws; he later pleaded guilty to 24 charges of hacking and was later released perplexingly after being fined merely AU$2100. Fearing as many as 10 excruciating years in prison, Assange struck a plea deal actually which the judge accepted surprisingly and ruled that Assange only had to pay a fine.

The kid picked the courage and found sentinels that protected and tasked him and then a day came when the Wiki started ‘Leaking’. There are two most interesting things; first, that the cables and notes about the American and NATO war crimes have surprisingly been muddled while the uncorroborated talk about so-called ISI-Taliban nexus is highlighted and second, amazingly the Americans, who, while having nightmares about Osama Bin Laden and the Taliban leadership, would always make a nonstop demand from Pakistan to apprehend and hand them over to the US, are absolutely speechless here in Julian’s case which is raising a lot of eyebrows. So much so was for a ‘criminal’.

Now when we talk of the critics, there are many self proclaimed geopolitical analysts who are patronised by the mushroom like Indian lobbies in the west and whose work often appears in few fanatic and pro Zionist western papers or the web journals. Some of them are just out of the incubator but claims to be an authority on Afghan and Pakistan issues. There is a one who is so insignificant that one would not like to mention his name even, yet he has come out with an idea of Balkanizing Pakistan. In any academic discourse one needs to verify the facts before venturing to give a point of view but here this self styled pseudo who seems to be totally disillusioned, clueless and have a thick mental fog, has come out with the idea of Balkanizing Pakistan. The idea could not be termed as more than a hilarious joke; nevertheless, one feels pity for an ignorant like Michael Hughes who doesn’t know even that the balkanizing process is meant for the unwieldy empires, federations and the unions like German empire, the USSR and if someone’s feelings are not hurt then the USA, whose balkanizing is in offing. There are lots of predictions about the Balkanizing of the USA by 2010 in line, like the one made by a Russian academic Professor Igor Panarin about ten years back. He predicted the macro Balkanizing of the United States of America purely concluded through his research and analysis and as he predicted the recent American eco-tsunami is just the first loose brick in the wall. One wonders if the Americans are seriously ready for it.

The dim-witted ideas cannot be bought merely for the reason that some fair skin has scripted them. One needs to talk with the logic basing on his wisdom which I am afraid Michael horribly lacks and which he needs to top up before his chinwags. Pakistan is a manageable entity, even smaller than many of the American states, hence the idea of Balkanizing it, sounds silly and more like giving independence to the counties. The world should rather concentrate on taking the preventive measures to stop the actual Balkanizing (of America) which is in offing silently.

The final word is about the new English controller David Cameron who before kicking off for India on a business tour very rudely and snobbishly, keeping all the diplomatic norms aside warned Pakistan to behave and to stop exporting terror to India. Agreed that the gentleman was leading a heavy business entourage but at no stage he should have forgotten that he was visiting a country as a head of the government and not as some business CEO. The former British foreign secretary Mr. Miliband very rightly said that there was a “big difference between straight-talking and being a loudmouth”. No one could have given a better shut up call to a David (Cameron) in chair, than a former chair holder David (Miliband). It is quite heartening to know that the British as a nation are still sane and sensible and the majority of them dislike the arrogance displayed by their Prime Minister. Mr. Miliband befittingly took on Cameron by saying that, “It is very, very important that the prime minister, who in three unscripted appearances at press conferences has gone off script … understands that we have got two ears and one mouth and it is very important to use them in that proportion.” So the moral of the story is that Mr. Cameron needs to grow up to the level of a seasoned and mature politician and behave above than a fifth grader.

The sacrifices made by Pakistan in GWOT are far more than the collective casualties of the American and ISAF, so one must think hundred times before levelling such irresponsible charges against a frontline war ally who is facing the music more than anyone else. However, if David Cameron seriously thinks that Pakistan is exporting terror (as he has probably prompted by his beloved friends Indians) to the neighbour than the best idea is to stop doing business with that partner. It’s undeniable fact that Pakistan has brought this global war at its doorsteps to make the world more peaceful. Never forget that if the games are being played, international conferences are being convened and the expos are being held the world over then certainly someone is paying a bloody price for it somewhere in South Asia so please don’t be a thankless. As a Bridge player you reserve the right to give the call that suits you but never forget that while holding a good hand Pakistan too can always surprise you with an abrupt ‘Three No Trumps’ call.

Sohail Parwaz is an established writer, his style of writing is more philosophic but still very focussed on the issue. This article is one such attempt. He is a regular contributor to Opinion Maker.


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  1. @ Sohail Parwaz,

    “Pakistan’s too much of nicety and selfless cooperation in the GWOT…………………..”

    ” The sacrifices made by Pakistan in GWOT are far more than the collective casualties of the American and ISAF……”

    - these are myth and lame arguments…. ! The Pakistani Army is acting reluctantly, albeit under tremendous pressure from its American masters. By doing so, the Pakistani Army is not doing anyone any favour, simply clearing up its own mess ! The so called sacrifices do not wash away the wrong doings that are continuing even today !

    - what any Indian commentator ( supposedly just out of the incubator ) have to say about balkanizing Pakistan, is besides the point …….. the point is the duplicity and double game that the Pakistani Army is playing for a long time.

    - You Pakistani commentators are brazen and thick skinned ………. you will not succeed in your attempt to hide the disturbing facts of the leaked documents, which only confirmed what was known for years ……. !

    • Jawad Zahiri says:

      Something is burning. Seems someone has stepped on your tail. tuss… tuss :-(

    • asif chauhdary says:

      Who plays a double game better than the wicked Indians, the Fuss Masters of the Sub-continent? Pakistan is not cleaning its own mess rather the trash thrown in its lawn by a dirty neighbour like India who has not admitted its founding from the day one. Soon the things are going to settle. It is just the matter of time. The Indians are active in Afghanistan only until the Americans are there. Afterwards………….. Tera kiya ho ga Kaliya?

  2. Dr.A.K.Tewari says:

    At least the author has clearly and openly accepted that his country is sitting in a cashino where the trump cards in its hand will determine the fate .Mind it , Islam strictly prohibits gambling ,That will certainly lead to disaster .

  3. Zabit Khan says:

    [...]while holding a good hand Pakistan too can always surprise you with an abrupt ‘Three No Trumps’ call.[...]

    I think the writer used the word ‘Can’ not ‘Will’ :-)

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